It’s so easy to get swallowed up by our projects. So much so that we almost forget that we have a family. I feel like I’m there. And I hate the feeling. I really, really, hate it. Yesterday afternoon was a bottom-of-the-barrel parenting experience for me. I’m not even going to tell you about. Just know that it was a “bad dad’ moment that I am not proud of.
I’ve had an epiphany (with some help from my wife, bless her heart). Between working a full-time job and my (selfish) self-interests (like blogging) I’ve become a part-time father. I’m distant — disconnected from my family. The bad part is: I’ve done it for so long that it feels natural. That is scary. Parents: you DON’T want to go there, trust me.
Perhaps I’ll find an early, early morning or late, late evening time to continue my writing and blogging. If not…that’s okay. I need to really (consistently) focus on being a full-time father and husband.
Here’s a list of some things I am going to do to become more engaged with my family.
- Stay off the computer. At least until much, much later in the evening. Family interaction is priority No. 1.
- Create some ‘family time’ where the computer and television are off. A time when we can all be in the same room and talk about our day, discuss upcoming projects/events/family fun times, etc.
- Get up a 15-30 minutes early each morning so I can spend time talking with my wife about the day’s activities, dinner plans, what tasks need to be taken care of, etc.
- Kiss my kids goodnight and tell them I love them and that I’m proud of them. I pretty much do this every night, but I want to be SURE that I keep it up.
- Make sure the house is de-cluttered and tidy before going to bed. It used to not bother me to have things in disarray’ but, the older I get the more I’m finding that waking up to a messy house puts me in a bad mood (who needs that?!?!). I seem to need more order and structure and clean spaces these days. I’m okay with that.
I’ll try to keep you posted on my progress. Depending on how much time I can spending updating the blog, you will hear from me sooner or later. J
Your turn: do you ever feel like a Bad Dad or a Bad Mom? What steps did you take to get back on solid ground? I will sure appreciate your help. You can leave a comment here.